You Can Now Purchase King of Pain # 1 Online!

King of Pain # 1 is available for purchase on Indy Planet now.

That's 36 pages of hilarious pain baby!

Hit the link and get it delivered!

Indy Planet ships worldwide.

Woo-hoo!

http://www.indyplanet.com/store/product_info.php?products_id=3027

Reality Check: Lemmings Don't Commit Suicide

Screw Attack recently reviewed the old Lemmings game for the Super Nintendo. I spent countless hours as a kid watching these poor pixelated creatures die by fire, blades, and smashing into the ground. It was a clever little puzzle game and fun to boot.

Video Games | ScrewAttack | Video Game Vault: Lemmings

XBox 360 | Playstation 3 | Nintendo Wii

I know Stuttering Craig's script is written for comedic effect, but it does perpetuate an urban legend: Lemmings commit mass suicide. But really, they don't. We all think they like to drink the proverbial kool-aid because we saw the old Disney documentary when we were kids. In the film, Lemmings dropped one after another off a cliff in what looked to be a suicidal fervor. What was really happening here? Simple: The Disney filmmakers encouraged the Lemmings to jump.

Snopes

Wildlife News

"According to a 1983 investigation by Canadian Broadcasting Corporation producer Brian Vallee, the lemming scenes were faked. The lemmings supposedly committing mass suicide by leaping into the ocean were actually thrown off a cliff by the Disney filmmakers. The epic "lemming migration" was staged using careful editing, tight camera angles and a few dozen lemmings running on snow covered lazy-Susan style turntable." -Riley Woodford-

That's messed up man.

In Disney's defense (sort of):

"Disney had to have gotten that idea from somewhere," said Thomas McDonough, the state wildlife biologist. Disney likely confused dispersal with migration, he added, and embellished a kernel of truth.

Lemming populations fluctuate enormously based on predators, food, climate and other factors. Under ideal conditions, in a single year a population of voles can increase by a factor of ten. When they've exhausted the local food supply, they disperse, as do moose, beaver and many other animals.

Lemmings can swim and will cross bodies of water in their quest for greener pastures. Sometimes they drown. Dispersal and accidental death is a far cry from the instinctive, deliberate mass suicide depicted in "White Wilderness," but Hibbler explains that life is tough in the lemmings' "weird world of frozen chaos." The voice-over implies that lemmings take the plunge every seven to ten years to alleviate overpopulation.

King of Pain # 1 On Shelves Wednesday!

King of Pain # 1 finally lands this Wednesday (November 25th) in Salt Lake City, Utah and Glendale, California.

It will be available at the following locations:

Salt Lake

Black Cat Comics

Dr. Volt's Comic Connection

Sam Weller's Zion Book Store

Glendale

Legacy Comics & Cards

I'm still waiting for it to show up on Indy Planet. On that site KoP #1 will be available worldwide for print-on-demand (as soon they get the damn thing up).

King of Pain # 2 Preview- Now with 100% more words!

King of Pain # 2, pages 1-5. Art By Sam Rodriguez. Words by Nicholas West. Cover by Chuck Landvatter.

Issue 2 will land in Utah, California, New York, Chicago, and on Indy Planet December 30th.

Check out Indy Comic Book Week's website and blog.

Gentlemen Broncos: See It Now!

I watched Gentlemen Broncos tonight. I laughed so hard I had tears in my eyes. My wife and I literally laughed all the way back to the car.

Yeah, I dig the Hess.

I was surprised at how psychoanalytical the movie was. And by psychoanalysis I mean SEX.

Seriously, it was hilarious and strangely kinky.

David Edelstein agrees.

But more than that I was inspired by Michael Angarano's sweet and heroic performance. The father/son/mother issues were seemingly simple but quite complex in their emotional depth. The character arc of "the main protag" would have made me cheer had I not been laughing so hard.

Jermaine Clement is genius. Jennifer Coolidge is (as always) lovable and entertaining. And Sam Rockwell kicks my ass with awesomeness.

Yes, this movie inspired me. I came home and immediately went to work on my own writing. That's what I love in a piece of art— a kick in the butt to my own works!

The tomatometer was low. Many of the critics said Hess went "too overboard" with his "potty humor." But these are the same guys that loved 40 Year Old Virgin and all of its uninspired ilk. So take that for what it is. Mormon's aren't allowed to be gross, only cynical Hollywood assholes are supposed to do that.

I kid, I kid.

See the movie!

Sam's Sketches

New stuff from Sam Rodriguez.

Midnight Rant: "Hollywood is officially out of blah, blah, blah..."

Here I am with another bitch and moan about movie news.

When discussing sequels, reboots, and/or the mining of nostalgia writers often use variations of the phrase "Hollywood is officially out of ideas." For instance here and here.

Firstly, this statement is ironic because it's become a cliche term.

Secondly, Hollywood is not out of ideas. Reboots and remakes are a long standing tradition in all forms of media and literature. We are not the first (or last) generation to experience recycled and repackaged story materials. Try and explore the origins of the "Sleeping Beauty" story and you will find sources in the 18th, 17th, and 16th centuries. (How dare Disney reboot Sleeping Beauty! Was he out of ideas?)

Now I, personally, am not bothered in the least when someone ham-fists a shitty reused concept. I am not afraid of what I deem bad art. I choose to place my focus on films I find interesting and let the ones I don't dig just be what they are. And I give you the freedom to feel how you want about them for your own self. No one needs to be afraid of ideas.

I do however have exceptions to my "high-minded" ideals stated above. They are as follows:

1) If someone reboots Superman and does a hack job I will hunt them down and make them pay. (I'm talking to you Wachowskis and JJ Abrams!)

2) I reserve the right to make fun of Twilight and all who partake of its awful soapy softcore mind-porn glory.

3) When exercising step 2 I will keep in mind that I love Chris Claremont's 1970's and 80's work on The Uncanny X-Men comic books. I mean I really love it; obsessed would be the correct term. While it is better writing than Stephanie Meyer's work, it puts her soapiness to shame.

4) I will continue to choose to be offended by such things as depicted in Jesus Camp and Hell House.

Thirdly, if Hollywood really is out of ideas, why are you still buying tickets?

Midnight Rant: Judging Art Before It's Finished- Movie Edition

I'm sick of movie news websites that decide they love or despise a movie while it's still in pre-production. We don't do this with music, paintings, books or even comic books. Why movies?

Long production, pre-release hype, and other known works are all factors of course.

What else? What makes movies so open to pre-release judgement?

An example of pre-production judgement of the negative form. This is a common form of online "journalism."

Sites I visit often are Cinema Blend and Aint-it-cool. The former known for its cynicism and negativity; the latter for singing praises to movies that turn out to be complete poop.

Alan Moore Named Official White House Biographer for Obama

From The Onion:

http://www.theonion.com/content/news_briefs/barack_obama_names_alan

Let's just hope it's one of his coherent efforts- as opposed to snake-god worshipping, drug-induced, twisted shakespearian/lovecraftian nonsense that we often get from Moore.

Science Saturday: June 12, 2010

*This is an article that will appear in King of Pain # 2. It sheds light on a few historical and cultural happenings in our comic book world. It's also a chance to have exposition that is lengthy and (best of all) guilt free.

Excerpts from the transcript of the “The Phil Lecture Radio Show” (or “Science Saturday”) from June 12th 2010.

00 min. 03 sec.

Phil Lecture (commentator): Welcome to “Science Saturday.” I’m Phil Lecture. Our first guest was born S-Gene positive, endowed with strong intellectual capabilities. You could call him a certified genius. He has been working on “Project M” for 12 years and with it’s recent de-classification, he’s here to let us know the details of the project and talk about his new book, “Olympus Reborn: Our World And The Gods That Inhabit It” which is on shelves now. Welcome Dr. Simon Lenelle.

Dr. Lenelle: Thank you Phil.

Phil Lecture: Doctor Lenelle, from reading your book I can attest that you have some fantastic information to share with us. First of all, how did your research come about?

Dr. Lenelle: Well, it started 13 years ago when the first extra terrestrial visitor of the modern age landed in Vermont. His name was Mythee and he was a political refugee from the planet Grazzm. It’s a long story really, a lot of it has been told in recent headlines, so in brief: The United States quickly took guardianship of Mythee and made all information concerning him classified to all but top-level personnel. He appeared and acted quite peaceful, however, every time Mythee saw a Super he reacted in an excited manner. It didn’t take long for government psychologists to realize that he actually knew who had powers and who didn’t. I was called in because of my security status and familiarity with S-Gene research. We began to study the Grazzm dialect and Mythee started to learn English which he adapted to quite gracefully- but it took a few years. As we communicated it became clear that he was a historian. He had been guarding his planet’s historical records when his current government found them unfavorable to their agenda. As the Grazzm government tried to re-write the records, Mythee attempted to oppose them, but eventually fled. He actually knew of Earth and felt he could keep a vault of accurate historical records here. We’ve been helping him to do just that. It has been a classified process until three weeks ago when the security levels were lifted by President Clan. I had anticipated this clearance and finished my book to coincide with the de-classification to help people understand a little bit about what we learned.

Phil: Why isn’t your book about Mythee himself? That seems to be the real curiosity to people right now. Why did you instead choose to focus on the origins of the S-Gene?

Lenelle: I would love to have told Mythee’s story, but, (I think its okay to announce this) he is actually writing his own book, in English! It’s an exciting time for my colleagues and I include Mythee as a peer and a colleague. His intellect is remarkable.

Phil: So you’re using what we know of his story as a jumping-off point to educate people on the S- Gene?

Lenelle: Exactly, and to inform them of its peculiar manifestation on our planet, which are, the so-called Supers. But it would’ve been difficult to discuss my theory without acknowledging where I obtained much of my data- Mythee’s history books were filled with his race’s scientific findings. Their histories differed from ours because they contained specific formulas and proofs in their historical texts rather than just the scientific publications. These records helped me to arrive at what seems to be the most reasonable explanation of the S-Gene explosion.

Phil: I guess it’s about time we heard your Theory huh?

Lenelle: Well, it’s less of a theory and more like documented history- albeit alien history! To state it simply, some members of the Grazzm race visited Earth during our pre- historic age. They left behind a satellite. By coincidence a NASA shuttle stumbled across it soon after we found Mythee. He helped us to recognize the inscriptions on the side of the satellite as an ancient form of his dialect. The satellite itself was leaking radiation, very slowly. Through his historical records, we were able to formulate the effect this radiation was having on our planet. As it turns out small doses of Grazzm radiation have brought about large consequences, namely mutations, in our species. It has caused the S-Gene manifestion in human beings!

Phil: Radiation from a leftover alien satellite- hmm. So tell me Doctor, why were the aliens here in the first place?

Lenelle: They came to terra-form our planet. They were going to use a virus like micro-organic substance to alter plant and animal life. In this way the atmosphere and all living things would become suitable to their living conditions, by way of controlled mutation.

Phil: And Mythee helped you learn all of this?

Lenelle: Yes, with his histories.

Phil: Where would this “terra-forming” have left human beings had it actually taken place?

Lenelle: We don’t know for sure, maybe we wouldn’t have evolved! But we discovered in our research…

Cut to 17 min. 05 sec.

Phil: …and I also read, you actually believe that the so-called Greek God’s of myth were, not so much myth, but manifestations of the S-Gene effect?

Lenelle: Yes, I talk about it very briefly in the book. This one’s a little harder to prove with current revealed documents. Some of my proofs are still classified but the Clan Administration has given me approval to speak of the theory itself. Yes, the Greek God’s were most likely the result of an S-gene breakout. They were essentially supers that formed tribes and squabbled and loved and fought and did all the things we read about. More on that can be said when certain classifications are, hopefully, lifted.

Cut to 35 min. 47 sec. (as pertaining to Mr. Kyle Kapowski)

Phil: Let’s take a call from Greg in Baltimore. Greg you’re on the air.

Caller (Greg): Hi Phil. Great show today. I was wondering, I know the doctor helped develop the S-gene tests. The police recently gave one to my brother. It turned out to be negative, but I was wondering if you could tell me how it works? My family always thought he might be a super, but the test was said otherwise. I wanted to know, is it really a foolproof test? And what are its origins? I’ll take my answer off the air- thank you.

Lenelle: Well Greg, I hope your brother’s run-in with the police was a pleasant one.

Lenelle and Phil: (chuckling)

Lenelle: To answer your question though Greg, the test is accurate. About 15 years ago, myself, and a colleague, Dr. Moon, isolated the so called “S-genes”. It’s a series of genes really, plural. We developed a fluorescence which will bind with the genes in question. It does this everywhere in the body…

Phil: The fluorescence is taken in pill form correct?

Lenelle: Right. It is taken orally and activates fully in about one hour. We then shine a light on the epedermic areas of the body. The light is designed to isolate the fluorescent bindings on the subjects DNA. If it glows neon-blue, you’re a “super.” If not, we don’t see anything. It’s highly unlikely that the test would give false results.

Phil: And as I understand, only Government agencies are allowed to administer the test. Why is that? Why can’t the common man find out for himself?

Lenelle: I deal with that in the book Phil. The chapter entitled “1999 and Government Sanctions” discusses this in depth. It really is for the best. As a federal employee with inside information I can say without a doubt that this needs to be regulated.

Phil: hmm... (long pause) Well, thank you for your time. We have been speaking with Doctor Simon Lenelle, author of...

Cut